J. Peterman
03-31-2008, 03:01 AM
sorry if this sucks i am really bored

okay i need to make a stupid story i will make it about the bomb
To begin now, with that forsaken promise. That last wish, your last wish. A single tear of heaven, falling from even the graceful. Falling, yet now bound for hell. By your side? Am I now bound too? Have you forgotten? Have you forgiven? I would die for you now, that gift, that promise, if you weren�t dead. If I didn�t already kill you. Where now is left for to me dream? Must I be damned? It wasn�t my fault. That promise, your last wish. It had to be mine.

I always thought that things would end there, at Wal-Mart. It is a pretty good store, some great prices, and definitely a great selection. I once went there looking for some food and ended up getting a job - they fired me because I was stealing their cheese. Yes, I like cheese. I just couldn't afford it with what they were paying me.

Okay so now that I wrote a paragraph that has nothing to with anything, I can write another that is exactly similar because I am bored and have nothing better to do. Her name was Mandi, I believe. Maybe, but I'm not really sure right now. She always bought the same thing - money from my cash register. That may have added to my problems there, but I'm not really sure. I just think it was his fault.

You know, the supervisor. I think he was gay. His name is Robert. I mean really gay. I mean, like he was making out with a poster of some guy in his underpants. Well, maybe he was just in love with posters. And poster ink. That could explain it. I always liked to smell glue whenever I was using it in elementary school. That is why they started giving me tape. Only tape. And then I started eating that. I wasn't allowed to do any crafts during the fifth grade, they just gave me a bunch of math problems. I like math.

My teacher's name, I forget it. I'll say she was Teehee. I actually don't remember her too well but she was fat. I remember this because one time I called her "fatso" and was sent to the principal's office. He told me what I said wasn't nice. I asked him why telling the truth was mean, and I was suspended me for the rest of the day. When I got home my dad laughed at what I said. He knew it was true. I wanted to buy Super Mario 64 but never did.

There was once this person I met that had a really bad name, I think. I'll call him Knegative. I think his name is really horrible, like Joseph. I'll just say he was sent to jail for robbing a bank - it is easier to lie than to try to remember stuff about him.

My name is Garamond. Okay there I made a stupid story about the next five people who posted after me in this weird chat thing at #ffshrine.

Have a nice day everybody.

03-31-2008, 04:23 AM
UR story sux.

J. Peterman
03-31-2008, 05:11 AM

03-31-2008, 05:22 AM
Take it up with Kpositive.

She encouraged it :mad:

execrable gumwrapper
03-31-2008, 05:25 AM
Where's Kneutral?

03-31-2008, 05:27 AM

J. Peterman
03-31-2008, 05:59 AM

03-31-2008, 03:03 PM
The story is good, very creative. A+ :D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D

something amusingly random
03-31-2008, 03:48 PM
what a ......

Pimp Daddy McSnake
03-31-2008, 03:48 PM

03-31-2008, 05:00 PM
The above poster's username is Ebichu.

03-31-2008, 05:57 PM
Cookie more like coochie

Pimp Daddy McSnake
03-31-2008, 06:10 PM
Hi Soybean

03-31-2008, 06:56 PM

something amusingly random
03-31-2008, 07:14 PM

J. Peterman
03-31-2008, 07:51 PM
okay five people in this thread i will write a story later sometime (tomorrow or sth)

03-31-2008, 10:26 PM

03-31-2008, 10:53 PM
Cattle Uniporn

J. Peterman
04-03-2008, 07:45 AM
I've always wanted to dance with a monkey on Thanksgiving, but I thought that would be rude. That is why I always told my aunt I couldn't dance with her. She's a monkey, I think. I'm not really sure. Her name is Hawkeye. Well, maybe. I call her Hawkeye and she leaves the room mumbling something under her breath. I think she's saying "Bless me, lord savior Atom Namor." She is crazy - believe you... just believe me.

I think Knegative is a really bad name... still. Nothing has really changed. I think. Knegative - I only learned that wasn't somebody's name. It was their monkey's name. The same monkey I wanted to dance with at Thanksgiving. Why did I call her Hawkeye then? I think it's because people lie too much. If she would just tell me her name, I wouldn't have to call her a whore.

I feel sorry for Knegative - I use that name for my uncle. You know, the monkey's husband. It's not really because she smells bad - for a monkey, mind you. But... it is because he has to talk to her on the way home about me. And I'm not very interesting, so they must not have much to talk about. I think that awkward silence must be really awful. Awkward and awful both begin with "aw", that's because you usually use those words during lunch. I'm not talking, so it's okay right here. This is all typed - writing - I am not saying anything. Hawkeye is - that monkey.

Wow, I think this made even less sense than the one before it. I really think it did. That's quite remarkable, if you ask me. I once asked myself a question, but I got the answer wrong. Remember, never answer Denmark. It's always North Dakota.

Pimp Daddy McSnake
04-03-2008, 08:10 AM
If she would just tell me her name, I wouldn't have to call her a whore.

Remember, never answer Denmark

04-03-2008, 08:17 AM
Why aren't you Trucy, yet?

Pimp Daddy McSnake
04-03-2008, 08:21 AM
I will fix that rite nao!!

J. Peterman
04-05-2008, 08:53 AM
I still don't know what I got for Christmas that year. I really never asked for much, never really wanted much, and that year was no exception. I don't remember waking up Christmas day. I don't remember falling asleep on Christmas eve. I just don't remember what it was that day I forgot, just that I forgot it. My aunt, I know enough she wasn't there. Whore, she wasn't there. I still don't her name.

Maybe it was Ebichu, maybe. My present, not the whore. You know, Ebichu. Like a Pokemon, I think. Except, not really. I think it wasn't, though, so I'll just call it Ebichu. I am sure that Ebichu was great, something awesome. To forget something like that - it had to be otherworldly. Ebichu comes from Mars.

My brother, his name was Shotoken. I think he's a girl now. But he was Shotoken, I believe. Actually, he wasn't. That was the name of one of my toys - not Ebichu, mind you. I don't even know if I ever got an Ebichu. I hope I did, though. It sounds awesome. But Shotoken, he was another toy. My aunt - she stole it. I think she was a lesbian.

Once, I heard some voice. The heavens, they told me that I would falter, as if to stumble and die. They told me that I would shatter, as if I was made of glass. And so I told the heavens that I would stop listening. I lied. I still hear what they say. They won't stop talking to me.

My aunt's name was Sarah. I'm sure.

04-05-2008, 10:06 AM
That was very disturbing

Pimp Daddy McSnake
04-05-2008, 10:29 AM
yet awesome

execrable gumwrapper
04-05-2008, 07:08 PM
Gara is too creative.

J. Peterman
04-06-2008, 07:50 AM
Something simple, that's what I want to talk about. Something rather simple, not complicated, not unique, not special. Just something easy to understand. That's all I wanted to talk about today. This is all just too confusing, though. Simple things always get too confusing. I don't understand why.

I used to sing songs, sometimes. My voice was never was any good, my songs were just as bad. But I used to sing them, all by myself. All to myself. These songs, I used to write them, always the same songs. Always the same lyrics. Pallawelis, I'm sure that's what they were called. The lyrics were always the same, the beat always the same. I think I stopped singing because people started listening. They were my songs, my bad songs. I don't think they should be making fun of me. My songs were made of paper.

I still remember that toy, that Ebichu. I still don't know if I ever got, but I remember it. Maybe I just played with at the store. I used to always play with their toys, so they kicked me out. Forever, I think. That's why I didn't have many toys. Just those few, always so happy together. I don't think they ever got married, though. My toys, I mean. They just played together, always running around, having such a great time. But Ebichu, I just don't remember having it. I think I didn't, though. I wouldn't forget having Ebichu. My toys are weren't homosexuals.

And still, they talk to me. As if the heavens would partake in madness, so too would I shine in glory. As if the heavens would grant that final wish, so too would I see beyond the stars. As if the heavens were to die, so too would I. Breathless, for that final moment. Life here before me, heaven further still.

I never stopped breathing. They told me to stop. I just didn't listen this time.

J. Peterman
04-09-2008, 09:38 AM
Unicorns, I never believed in them. I never thought they were real, just another lie. Too many people lie, too many things deceive. Battling unicorns, now that I would believe. Nothing ever wants to stay at peace - death, I like to think that's what they would look for. What else could unicorns do? They aren't ponies.

I always ate more than I supposed to, always more than I wanted. The cookie, that cookie, I always took it. Sometimes, I would just hide them in my room. I don't really know why, don't know where, but I did. Just hiding, waiting for me. I'm sure they'd still be there if it wasn't for my mother. I never cleaned my room.

I don't think I ever watched the sun set, or the sun rise. Just too late, or too early, for me, I guess. It's something I could change, something I could do, but I don't think I'm willing. I don't think enough about these things to really care. That tear of heaven, I think I lost it. Oh well.

And so, this should be it. I don't have much more to say. Only thing, I hope I find that toy. That Ebichu, you know? It's something I always wanted, I just hope I have it. Somewhere, locked away. I think my heart, it would shatter if I didn't. Just like Denmark, too fragile to be a Dakota.

Heaven, that star that shines above me as my light, I think I can burn it out. At least try to. The heavens, that which is graceful - the sinful would just sin again. Heaven partake in madness, light veiled in shadow, sacred guide that just fools. What dreams, these thoughts, things I’m forced to remember, all just to forget. I don’t know how it started, how it’s going to end, I don’t. I don’t think I could ever betray the heavens, I don’t think. Black even beyond darkness, light even beyond day. Hope, just hope, that much I’m willing to crush.

Heaven partake in madness, hell partake in grace. Breathless. I think I’ll listen now.


06-27-2008, 07:10 PM
I like it, though I'll probably have to read through it again to understand it.

Sorry for digging up a two month-old thread to say this, but this kept scratching at the back of my head and I haven't posted in a long while.

06-27-2008, 10:33 PM
This forum is full of the clusterfucks that our world needs.

Hats off, ladies and gentlemen.

J. Peterman
06-28-2008, 02:37 AM
lol bill gates is awesome

Marshall Lee
06-28-2008, 05:41 AM
Pimps up, ho's down!

Hi Ebi...

execrable gumwrapper
06-28-2008, 05:58 AM

something amusingly random
06-28-2008, 08:57 PM
I think I have seen this thread yet ....

shut up!

06-29-2008, 01:33 AM
What? lol

06-29-2008, 05:11 AM
Gara is too creative.

His "creativity" is melting my skull from inside out... I really don't know if that's positive or not considering thers this soopy liguid on ze flur wich ei hve n u clu w ti sis ssssdrrrrrrr...r. e;m....

J. Peterman
06-29-2008, 05:15 AM
freakyloser shotoken is a moron and jerk don't listen to him

06-29-2008, 05:39 AM

06-29-2008, 05:40 AM
True, he never acknowledged your creativity. I loved the stories btw.

06-29-2008, 05:44 AM

J. Peterman
06-29-2008, 07:00 AM
i wrote this when i was bored

06-29-2008, 08:39 AM
I wrote this on my phone.

08-31-2008, 06:38 PM
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